April 1, 2016
11:21am
Concerned that Venice has lost every conceivable pretense of hipness due to rising home costs and an over-abundance of computer animation executives, the city will soon move a collective farm founded in 1968 from Woodstock, New York to a site near Venice beach.
Excited not only by the prospect of Venice reclaiming its once unique feel but an expected surge in sales of tambourines and
cigarette papers, Venice officials are doing everything they can to make the hippies feel welcome. “We’re rolling out the worn-out Persian rugs and setting up bean bag chairs like crazy!” enthused one official close to the project. A grand opening ceremony will include music by David Crosby and a reenactment of a famous fight between two members of the collective over whose “old lady” a woman named Turquoise Star Angel really was. In addition to a marathon Frisbee event, plans include (continued on pg 74)
